This week’s show starts off
with a GONG and it is time for the Undertaker to make his annual
pre-Wrestlemania return to WWE. The Wrestlemania logo appears on the
TitanTron.
We are in Buffalo, New York and your announcers are Michael ‘Will anyone mind this Brett Hull sweater’ Cole and Jerry ‘How about some Buffalo Wings to go with last week’s Sonic’ Lawler?
We have the old announce table and the WWF era jackets. Jerry and Michael wonder what Undertaker’s entrance at the start of the show meant.
CM Punk and Paul Heyman make their way to the ring.
Punk says that he should be main eventing this year’s Wrestlemania. He should be defending his championship in the main event of this year’s Wrestlemania, but he is not. Not because of anything he did or didn’t do. He is not in the main event of Wrestlemania or the champion because of the fans. They stole from him what he holds most precious.
Punk tells specific fans they screwed him. In screwing him, they only screwed themselves. If he is not going to be in the main event of Wrestlemania, there is no point for CM Punk to be at Wrestlemania.
What the world just saw gives him that purpose. They took from him and now he is going to take from them. He is going to beat the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. If the people like the 20-0 streak, but they roll their eyes at a 434 day title reign? Punk says that he backs it up when he says that he is the best. Nobody else has done anything great in their lives. If they steal from him, he steals from them.
Punk has a new number for the fans. That number is 20-1. That one is drug free, alcohol free, and straight edge. That one is CM Punk and he stands in front of you on Raw. He will beat the streak and he tells everyone to deal with it.
Randy Orton’s music plays and he has something to say. Randy tells Punk that he shouldn’t be so confident. Randy reminds Punk that he beat him at Wrestlemania. Randy reminds Punk that he faced the Undertaker eight years ago at Wrestlemania and he came close. Randy says that he is no longer a rookie. He is the most dangerous man in the locker room. He is the apex predator.
Randy asks the WWE Universe who they would rather see face the Undertaker at Wrestlemania.
Not to be outdone, a third man has thrown his hat into the ring and that is the Big Show. Show tells them that they are running off at the lip about facing the Undertaker. What do they think they have to beat the Undertaker. Show says that he faced the Undertaker, but he didn’t have his fist back then.
If you are going to take on the phenom and beat the streak, you need to be more than a Viper or Straight Edge. You need to be a Giant. That giant is going to knock that streak into oblivion.
Sheamus makes his way onto the stage and he says that everyone has been talking about how they are going to beat the Undertaker. Sheamus says that he has never faced the Undertaker so he has never lost to him. With the streak on the line, it will take more than a big fist, a GTS, or an RKO to put the big man down. Maybe it will take his big boot, all the heart in the world, and a little luck to achieve the impossible. When you have the luck of the Irish on your side, anything is possible.
Vickie Guerrero comes out and says that the man who will beats the Undertaker and ends the streak at Wrestlemania will cement their legacy as the best of all time. In order to determine who gets to break the streak, there will be a fatal four way match. The winner will face The Undertaker at Wrestlemania.
Ryback is walking in the back and he will face Antonio Cesaro because it feels like the feud has been going for twenty years.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Antonio Cesaro is in the Goldman Box and he says that he speaks five languages. Like most people Ryback barely speaks one language and he calls Ryback a Neanderthal.
Match Number One: Ryback versus Antonio Cesaro in a Non Title Match
Cesaro with drop kicks to stagger Ryback but Ryback with a body block. Ryback with chops in the corner followed by a shoulder and then he hits a power slam but Cesaro rolls to the floor. Ryback punches Cesaro on the apron and then he hits a delayed vertical suplex on Cesaro.
Cesaro with a head butt followed by punches and kicks. Ryback sends Cesaro to the apron but Cesaro drops Ryback on the top rope. Cesaro goes up top and Ryback presses Cesaro over his head and he drops Cesaro on his chest. Ryback clotheslines Cesaro over the top rope to the floor.
Ryback chases Cesaro around the ring and Cesaro is kicked by Ryback. Cesaro sends Ryback into the turnbuckles and then he connects with a running boot that knocks Ryback off the apron and into the guardrails. Ryback returns to the ring and Cesaro gets a near fall. Cesaro punches Ryback.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Cesaro with a sleeper on Ryback. Cesaro with knees and then he slaps Ryback and calls him stupid. Ryback with elbows and a back bodry drop. Ryback with a spinebuster and then he signals for the lariat but Cesaro with a European uppercut and he tries for the Gotch Style Neutralizer but Ryback blocks it and hits the marching muscle buster for the three count.
Winner: Ryback
After the match, Mark Henry makes his way into the arena. We have a stare down between these two men but Mark Henry makes his way to the ring.
Match Number Two: Mark Henry versus Zack Ryder
Henry throws Ryder into the turnbuckles and Ryder with forearms. Henry with an Irish whip and clothesline. Henry with the World’s Strongest Slam for the three count.
Winner: Mark Henry
Dolph Ziggler, Big E Langston, and AJ Lee walk in the back. We go to commercial.
We are back and Miz has something to say . . . as soon as the mic works. Since WWE is paying tribute to Old School, Miz introduces a man who personifies Old School and New School. He makes his corner look at lot better than Ziggler’s. He brings out his friend and mentor, Ric Flair.
Match Number Three: Dolph Ziggler (with Big E Langston and AJ Lee) versus Miz (with Ric Flair)
They lock up and they try to get an advantage but they go to a stalemate. They lock up again and Ziggler with a knee and forearm to the back. Ziggler with a punch and he tells Flair to pay attention. Miz with kicks and punches but Ziggler with a kick and punches of his own.
Ziggler with a chop that is not quite up to Flair’s level of intensity. Miz with a punch and kick that sends Ziggler to the floor. Flair gets on the apron and then he struts. Miz with a strut of his own.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Ziggler with a neck breaker and he gets a near fall. We see footage from the commercial break when Miz tried for Reality Check but only hit the first neck breaker and Ziggler with a drop kick. Back to the action in the ring and Ziggler with a reverse chin lock and bridge to add more pressure. Miz with elbows but Ziggler with a punch. Miz with a kick and punch.
They exchange kicks and Miz with punches. The referee pulls Miz out of the corner. Miz is sent to the apron and Miz slides under and gets a near fall with a sunset flip. Miz with Reality Check for a near fall. Ziggler with an inside cradle for a near fall. Miz with kicks and then he goes for Ziggler’s knee and he clips him.
Ziggler with a leaping DDT and Ziggler gets a near fall. Ziggler goes for a sleeper but Miz pushes him away. Miz misses a running boot and Ziggler is able to apply the sleeper and he gets Miz down to his knee.
Miz escapes and then he sends Ziggler into the air and Dolph lands on his chest. Miz hits the Awesome Clothesline and then he goes up top and hits the double sledge. AJ gets on the apron and the referee is distracted. Langston hits Miz and Flair throws his jacket over Langston’s head and he chops Langston but Langston is not amused.
Miz with a baseball slide to Langston and Ziggler with a rollup for a near fall. Miz applies the figure four and Ziggler taps out.
Winner: Miz
After the match we get Classic Flair in the ring.
We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time for the Rock to make his way to the ring.
Rock says that he needs everyone to understand something. He just came in from Panama where it 95 degrees every single day. The Rock knew that he was coming to Raw and he was excited. He packed his clothes, his boots, and his boots to asses boots. Rock was asked at the airport if he needed a jacket and he said that he don’t need a jacket.
He has electricity coming out of his body. Enough to melt an igloo. Rock arrived in Buffalo and it is cold. It is so cold that he had icicles forming on the People’s nipples. Rock says that he landed with a smile. It meant that after ten long years . . .
FINALLY . . . the Rock has come back to Buffalo.
Rock says that he has circled this date on his calendar for a long time because we are a little more than a month away from Wrestlemania. We see the sign and then . . .
We hear John Cena’s music and he makes his way to the ring.
John says that Rock is right about it being 34 days away. John says that he has been waiting for this moment for a year. Rock cannot know why because he is Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. The man who conquered the WWE in the Attitude Era. He conquered Hollywood and then he conquered the WWE again and is the WWE Champion. John says that Rock doesn’t know what it feels like to tell the people who care about that you had to do something and fail.
Last year at Wrestlemania, John said that he needed to win that match, but he failed. It makes you feel worthless. It makes you feel like a crowd of hate is falling upon you. That match at Wrestlemania was not just a loss to the Rock, it sent his life into a tailspin. Right after Wrestlemania his life fell apart professionally and personally. He could not get the win that he claimed that he demanded.
The loss caused his failure, but it also caused his rejuvenation. The night that Rock won the WWE Title, he won the Royal Rumble. The following week, he finally beat CM Punk. This is more than a match for him, it is a shot at redemption. John says that he has been given a second chance to right the biggest failure of his life. He is not throwing this chance away.
Rock says that fire and desire makes him happy. That was the man who said he would beat CM Punk last week and he did. There was only one man who the Rock wanted to face at Wrestlemania and it was John Cena. He knows what this means to John Cena. He knows that when John runs to the ring and does everything, it matters. There is no one in the locker room who has that passion and fire to be the best. No one has that . . .
Except the Rock.
As much as it matter to John, it matter so much more to him. When his music hits and he walks down that ramp and enters the ring and connects with every single person in this arena it matters to him.
In 34 days, John Cena is not getting redemption, he is getting his ass kicked.
John says that those were strong words. Cena says that he wants to quote one of the great philosophers of his time and he quotes Mike Tyson. Mike Tyson is responsible for one of the most powerful quotes and it reminds him of Rock. In order to be the greatest who ever lived, you have to beat everyone living. Cena says that he has accomplished every single goal in his career except for beating The Rock.
At Wrestlemania 29, Rock’s time is up . . . his time is now.
Rock tells John that he is sorely mistaken. Rock’s time has just started. Rock has a quote for John. Winning is about heart, you just gotta have it in the right place. That man was Lance Armstrong. That man was full of crap and so is Cena.
Cena appreciates Rock’s confidence. In thirty-four days, history will not repeat itself. He will make history. He will become the WWE Champion.
Rock says that Cena just crystallized everything that is Rock and John Cena. John thinks he can beat Rock, but Rock says that he knows that he will beat John Cena. Rock says that he will beat John Cena . . . again. Rock tells John to smell what he is cooking.
We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time to remember what happened at the start of the show when a gong went off and the building was bathed in a sea of blue.
Match Number Four: Jack Swagger (with Zeb Colter) versus Jim Duggan (with Dusty Rhodes and Sergeant Slaughter)
Duggan gets a USA chant started and Swagger goes to the floor and he takes the 2x4. Duggan wants Swagger to put the board down. Swagger hits Duggan in the midsection and then he hits Slaughter and Dusty with it.
Swagger points at the Wrestlemania sign and yells ‘We the People’ before applying the ankle lock. The referee tries to get Swagger to release the hold.
No Contest
We take a look at Marine 3.
Daniel Bryan and Kane are walking in the back as we go to commercial.
We are back and Josh Mathews wants to know how Jack can be so disrespectful. Jack says that this is his America. Standing up for the honor of the Americans who were taken down in the ring, it is Mexican Alberto Del Rio who attacks Jack.
Ted DiBiase is at ringside for the next match.
Match Number Five: Daniel Bryan and Kane versus Darren Young and Titus O’Neil (with No Stupid Stipulations)
Young and Kane start things off and Darren with a side head lock. Kane with a shoulder tackle followed by an uppercut. Bryan tags in and he goes up top for a double sledge to the arm. Bryan with kicks of No to Young followed by a hammer lock. Young with an elbow. Bryan with a drop kick and he gets a near fall.
Titus tags in and Bryan with elbows and forearms but Titus with a clothesline and he barks. Titus with boots to Bryan and he tags Young back in. Titus sends Young onto Bryan with a gourdbuster. Young with a fist drop or two for a near fall as they try to impress Ted DiBiase. Titus tags in and he applies a reverse chin lock.
Titus with a forearm and then he misses a charge into the corner and hits the turnbuckles hard with the shoulder. Kane and Young tag in and Kane with a punch to the midsection followed by a boot to the head and a drop kick. Kane with an Irish whip and clothesline into the corner. Kane with a second one and he hits the side slam and gets a near fall. Titus breaks up the cover and he tries to sent Bryan to the floor but Bryan lands on the apron. Titus goes to the floor and Bryan with a running knee off the apron.
Young comes off the turnbuckles and Kane with a choke slam for the three count.
Winners: Kane and Daniel Bryan
After the match, Ted DiBiase takes a hundred dollar bill and he stuffs it in Darren’s mouth.
Bryan goes back to take the money from Darren’s mouth.
The Honky Tonk Man is in the back . . . at least it is his back and we go to commercial.
We are back and Heath Slater says that nobody came to see Honky Tonk Man or hear him sing. 3MB is the future of music. He tells Honky that he has to go back to Las Vegas to be with the Elvis
Match Number Six: Tensai and Brodus Clay (with Cameron, Naomi, and th Honky Tonk Man) versus Heath Slater and Drew McIntyre (with Jinder Mahal)
McIntyre and Tensai start things off and Drew with punches and kicks. Drew misses a splash into the corner and Tensai with a rollup for the three count.
Winners: Tensai and Brodus Clay
After the match, we have some dancing and then Honky Tonk Man has his music play. Slater interrupts and he gets hit in the head by the guitar.
We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time to take a look at Wade Barrett at the World Premiere of Dead Man Down.
Fandango says that is inappropriate. He says that he will not make his debut until you learn how to pronounce his name. Justin tries again but Fandango tells him that he needs to feel it. He needs to let the ‘A’s breathe. He says that he will not stand here and watch Justin Roberts butcher his name. Tonight is a night that everyone will remember. Tonight was the night that you almost got to see the debut of Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaandannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time to remember what happened last week on Raw between Triple H and Brock Lesnar.
It is Game Time and Triple H makes his way to the ring with his leather jacket and water bottle. After a week off, the Game Fountain has returned.
He says that the last time he was in the ring with a mic, it was eight days after he lost to Brock Lesnar at SummerSlam. Hunter says that he thought he was done that time. Hunter says that he doesn’t know if he was trying to convince the fans or himself. The second that cast was off, he was back in the gym. He says that he had no real purpose. Hunter was the COO and he cut his hair.
Hunter says that he was training every day and he was in the best shape in years. He was waiting for a reason. Hunter says that he was sitting next to a man who had just had hip surgery. That old man is the guy who created all of this. Put aside that it was his wife and kids who were crying at bedside. Hunter says that he had a smile inside and he found his reason.
When that crazy ass old man got out of that bed to challenge Paul Heyman to a fight. When Paul turned to Brock Lesnar, Hunter was ready. He tells Brock to feel those staples on the top of his head if he thought they were done at SummerSlam. They are just getting started.
Hunter says that it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know why he is in the ring. They are five weeks from the Big Dance and he is calling Brock out. Brock is usually the guy who does the destruction, but last week, he split Brock wide open. He wants to finish what they started. Hunter says that the asskicker is back. The King of Kings is back. The Game is back and he is calling Brock out for Wrestlemania. Will Brock show up at Wrestlemania to fight or is he going to sit there and bleed?
Hunter drops the mic and he leaves the ring.
We go to commercial.
We are back with the WWE Rewind: The Shield facing off with Sheamus and Randy Orton on Friday.
We have a response that was pre-recorded by the Shield. They pick up the Camcorder and they introduce themselves. Dean says that everyone wants to make history. They are all going to throw their hat in the ring to face the Undertaker. Good for Randy and Sheamus. Maybe they are forgetting something.
Seth points out that Undertaker at 20-0 is impressive. Taker is not the only person riding an impressive undefeated streak. The Shield is undefeated.
Dean says that the eye of justice is always watching. Even the Big Show.
Reigns says that he got in a cheap shot, but that is the only one.
Dean says that no one can beat them.
Match Number Seven Wade Barrett versus Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez)
Barrett with a kick and punches. Del Rio with an Irish whip and Del Rio puts Wade in the ropes and he connects with forearms and hits a lungblower. Barrett rolls to the floor while Swagger and Colter make their way into the arena.
Del Rio rolls Barrett back into the ring and Barrett with the Black Pool Slam and he gets a near fall. Barrett with elbow drops to Del Rio and he gets a near fall. Barrett with a side head lock and Del Rio with a knee. Del Rio with an Irish whip but Barrett sends Del Rio to the apron. Barrett with a punch and he chokes Del Rio in the ropes.
Del Rio with a cross arm breaker in the ropes and he releases at four. Barrett with a boot to Del Rio to knock him off the apron. Barrett puts Del Rio over the apron and Barrett with knees to the head and then he connects with a boot to the head and Del Rio falls to the floor. Barrett with a near fall.
Barrett misses an elbow drop from the turnbuckles when Del Rio moves. Del Rio with two clotheslines and he avoids a clothesline and hits a tilt-a-whirl back breaker. Del Rio sets for the super kick and he connects for a near fall.
Del Rio charges into the corner but Barrett moves. Barrett with a super kick and then he tries for a pump handle slam. Del Rio escapes and Barrett tries for another Black Pool Slam but Del Rio counters with the float over into the cross arm breaker and Barrett taps out.
Winner: Alberto Del Rio
We go to commercial.
We are back with the latest Zeb Colter video. This week’s topic is about Political Correctness.
The New Age Outlaws make their way to the ring and it is time for someone to suck it.
Match Number Eight:New Age Outlaws versus Epico and Primo (with Rosa Mendes)
Epico and Road Dogg start things off and Epico with punches. James with punches and then he drops a knee to Epico and gets a near fall. James punches Primo on the apron but Epico with a drop kick for a near fall. Primo tags in and he kicks James. Epico tags back in and he kicks James. Primo tags back in and hits a slingshot senton and kicks James some more. Epico tags back in and hits a slingshot elbow drop.
Epico with a reverse chin lock. Epico and James bump heads and they are down. Gunn tags in and he punches Epico and Primo and then he hits a tilt-a-whirl slam on Primo. Epico and James go to the floor. Gunn with a kick and Fameasser for the three count.
Winners: New Age Outlaws
We take a look back at the comments from John Cena and Rock earlier tonight.
We go to commercial.
We are back with some Touts (which is very Old School) about Undertaker’s return.
We are in the back and the wrestlers are on the stage to celebrate Mae Young’s 90th birthday. Mean Gene Okerlund comes out to introduce Mae. The Divas bring her out to see her cake.
CM Punk interrupts the celebration and he makes his way to the ring for the main event.
We go to commercial.
Match Number Nine: Big Show versus Randy Orton versus Sheamus versus CM Punk in a Who Gets to Face Undertaker at Wrestlemania Match
Punk leaves the ring and then Orton and Sheamus join Punk on the floor. Punk returns to the ring and he backs into Show. Show with a head butt. Show sends Sheamus to the floor. Orton drops Show on the top rope and he kicks and punches Show. Show with a head butt to Orton and he tries to sent Orton into the ring post but Orton counters and he sends Show into the ring post.
Sheamus and Orton are in the ring while Punk and Show stay on the floor. Orton and Sheamus exchange punches. Sheamus with a forearm. Orton with a back breaker and Punk covers Sheamus and gets a near fall before going back to the floor. Orton with European uppercuts to Orton but Orton with a kick. Sheamus with the uranage back breaker and he tries to get the cover on Orton. Sheamus pulls Punk back into the ring and Orton and Sheamus throw Punk over the top rope. Show with a punch to Orton and a chop to Sheamus.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Punk with punches to Orton followed by a snap mare and knee drop for a near fall. We see Big Show and Sheamus laid out on the floor. We see Orton hit the Super IEDDT on Big Show during the commercial.
Orton with a clothesline as he comes out of the corner on an Irish whip. Orton with another clothesline and then he avoids a clothesline and hits a power slam. Orton with an exploder suplex for a near fall. Orton tries for the IEDDT but Punk gets into the ring and he back body drops Orton to the floor. Sheamus with a slingshot shoulder tackle and he gets a near fall.
Sheamus with the ‘JBL wishes Sheamus would do this to Josh Mathews’ series of forearms across the chest. Show with the Final Cut for a near fall and Punk breaks up the cover. Punk with knees and forearms to Show but Show knocks out Punk, but Sheamus punches Show. Show with punches and an Irish whip. Sheamus with shoulders in the corner followed by a knee lift.
Sheamus with a flying forearm and Show is down. Sheamus tries for White Noise but Show with a forearm to the back. Show misses the elbow drop from the turnbuckles. Sheamus gets Show up for White Noise and he hits it but only gets a near fall.
Sheamus looks around and he lets out a FELLA and then he gets ready for the Brogue Kick by punching his chest. Orton with a power slam to Sheamus for a near fall. Show grabs Orton by the throat and then he does the same to Sheamus and punches him away. Show with a choke slam to Orton. Show blocks the Brogue Kick and he hits a choke slam on Sheamus for a near fall.
Show gets ready for the knockout punch on Sheamus and Sheamus avoids it and Sheamus hits the Brogue Kick but Show goes to the floor. Orton with the RKO to Sheamus. Punk with the Go To Sleep to Orton and he gets the three count.
Winner: CM Punk
After the match, we hear the GONG and the lights go blue. We have a stare down as we go to credits.
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