martedì 21 maggio 2013

COMPLETE WWE RAW REPORT: RYBACK HAS NEW WHEELS; THE SHIELD FACE THEIR OPPONENTS FROM SUNDAY; A NEW HEYMAN GUY . . . AND HE IS PERFECT IN THE RING; WHEN THE DOCTOR SAYS YOU CANNOT WRESTLE . . . YOU LISTEN TO THEM


Last night we experienced the most EXTREME night in the WWE and we were presented with a Last Man Standing Match with a no contest. But we did see the rise of the Shield because now they have championship gold. What is next for John Cena after not losing the title last night? When will Dolph Ziggler return to the ring? Will Wade Barrett change shirts tonight?
We are in Kansas City, Missouri and your announcers are Jerry ‘We had the Kings before Sacramento’ Lawler, Michael ‘Don Denkinger’ Cole, and John ‘We replay finishes on Sunday nights’ Layfield.
An ambulance pulls into the arena as we begin the show and it drives into Alberto Del Rio’s space.
Ryback emerges from the back of the ambulance and we see photos of what happened during the match.
Ryback gets on the ambulance and he says that the match was a no decision last night. As far as the record books indicate, there was no real winner. John Cena might have walked away with the WWE Championship, he did not walk away. He was carried away.
We see John Cena wheeled to the ambulance on a stretcher, but John refused to go to the hospital or see any doctors.
Ryback says that Cena refused to be put into an ambulance, but the next time they meet, he will not refuse.
Ryback says that he is not standing on the ambulance so the idiots will think he is cool. Ryback wants to face John Cena at Payback in an Ambulance Match. It does not matter if you are standing or not. It does not matter if you are breathing or not, you just have to put your opponent in an ambulance.
Ryback says that most of the people would skip the medical facility and go straight to the morgue. Ryback calls everyone weak. He has nothing in common with any of them. You do not realize what it feels like to wake up every day wanting to be the best. He says that everyone is a lost soul of society and you worship John Cena. You want to be like John Cena and John Cena is your hero.
Ryback calls that pathetic. They have nothing in common with John Cena. They know nothing about nutrition or education. You do not know what hard work is. Ryback says that he will take John Cena to the medical facility and to the morgue. He will take everyone to the morgue with John Cena.
There is only one thing in life . . . Ryback Rules.
We are going to find out who Paul Heyman’s new client is, but that is later tonight.
We go to commercial.
Match Number One: Miz and Chris Jericho versus Wade Barrett and Fandango (with Summer ‘Not Sue’ Rae)
Barrett tells Fandango to go to the apron so he can start and he faces Jericho. Barrett with a side head lock and shoulder tackle but Jericho with a drop kick. Jericho with chops but Barrett with an elbow. Fandango tags in and he goes after Jericho and punches him. Fandango kicks Jericho and then gives him a hard Irish whip. Fandango with a European uppercut and forearms.
Fandango punches Jericho but Jericho punches back. Jericho with an Irish whip but he runs into a boot from Fandango. Fandango tags Barrett back in because Fandango needs to pose on the apron and Jericho goes to the floor as we go to commercial.
We are back and Barrett with a reverse chin lock on Miz while Fandango and Summer stand on the floor. Miz with a knee to the midsection followed by a running boot to the head. Miz grabs a leg and he goes for the figure four leg lock but Fandango says something on the mic and it confuses everyone in the building.
It is time for some dancing while Miz and Barrett are down on the floor. Barrett yells at the dancing fools and that allows Jericho to tag in and he connects with a shoulder tackle or two but Barrett sends Jericho over the top rope but Jericho goes to the apron and he hits a double sledge from the top. Jericho with a bulldog followed by a Lionsault.
Jericho with a Codebreaker and Jericho decides to tag in Miz who applies the figure four leg lock and Barrett taps out.
Winner: Chris Jericho and Miz
After the match, Jericho and Miz approach Fandango and Summer and Fandango runs through the crowd and he leaves Summer at ringside.
Jericho offers his hand to dance and she accepts. Jericho dips Summer and then he tells Summer to talk to the hand and he leaves.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Vickie Guerrero makes her way onto the stage and she says excuse me about as many times as the referee asked if Del Rio or Swagger wanted to quit. Vickie says that Jack Swagger will be in a match tonight and if you have downloaded the app, you can choose his opponent. The choices are the Great Khali, R Truth, or Randy Orton.
The announcers talk about the decision to restart the I Quit Match.
We also see photos of The Shield holding their new titles.
Daniel Bryan is in the locker room and he is pissed. Kane stops by and he asks if Daniel is ready. Daniel says that he is not the tag team champions, Kane is not the tag team champions, and they are not the tag team champions.
Kane says that this negativity is not working. Daniel says that he feels naked without the titles. Daniel wants to know how Kane can make jokes. Kane says that he is confident and they have a rematch. He says that you cannot show weakness.
Daniel asks Kane if he is implying that he is the weak link.
Kofi interrupts and tells them to calm down.
Match Number Two: Sheamus versus Titus O’Neil (with Darren Young)
They lock up and they go around the ring until they get into the corner and Sheamus with a clean break. Sheamus with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. Titus with a side head lock and shoulder tackle and he barks.
Sheamus sends O’Neil to the apron and he connects with a forearm. Sheamus wraps Titus in the ropes and he connects with forearms across the chest. Sheamus kicks Titus in the knee to force him off the apron. Sheamus with a kick to Darren and he sends Darren into the ringside barrier. Titus with a clothesline to Sheamus.
They return to the ring and Titus with a fallaway toss and he utters some nasty words before he gets the near fall. Titus with a head butt and punches followed by kicks in the corner. Sheamus with punches but Titus with a back elbow and he gets a near fall. Titus sends Sheamus back to the mat and he kicks Sheamus.
Titus picks up Sheamus and unfurls him into the mat and gets a near fall. Titus with a quarter nelson and chin lock. Sheamus with boots to Titus as he charges into the corner. Sheamus with two running double sledges followed by a shoulder into the corner and a running knee lift. Sheamus gets Titus on his shoulders but Titus escapes and sends Sheamus to the floor.
Darren grabs Sheamus’ leg when he goes for the slingshot shoulder tackle and Titus with a forearm and he gets a near fall. Titus gets Sheamus up for a power slam but Sheamus escapes and then he gets Titus on his shoulders for White Noise.
Sheamus looks around and he pounds his chest for the Brogue Kick and he connects and gets the three count.
Winner: Sheamus
We go to commercial.
We are back and Paul Heyman makes his way to the ring. Paul says that he understands that when it is a Paul Heyman guy who exposes their heroes, he gets the boos from the crowd. Paul tells them to boo him all they want. Paul asks what it feels like to be powerless. Their boos will never change the historical fact that a true ‘Paul Heyman’ guy, the beast incarnate BROCK LESNAR beat Triple H in a steel cage match at Extreme Rules.
History will not record the boos and jeers for Paul Heyman, they will record that Brock emerged victorious from Extreme Rules. The COO of WWE will go down in history against his client as a loser.
Paul says that his client is enjoying the spoils of war while Hunter had to tuck his sledgehammer between his legs and go home to mommy. It takes a real man to bring a sledgehammer into a cage match against Brock Lesnar.
What will Paul Heyman talk about now that Brock has fulfilled his contractual obligation. It is time to give to the WWE Universe that moment in time when you set your DVRs so you can watch it back ten years later. That was the moment that history took a left turn.
Now is the time to hit record because Paul Heyman presents to you the newest Paul Heyman Guy . . .
Michael McGillicutty, who is now known as Curtis Axel.
Paul thanks everyone for proving him right again. This was the same reaction he warned his client he was going to face. It was the same reaction that people gave to the NCAA Division I Champion, the man who took care of Triple H last night BROCK LESNAR. It is the same reaction they gave him in 2006 when in the new ECW, he presented them the man who would reign for 434 days as WWE Champion, CM Punk.
Paul talks about the heritage and pedigree going for Curtis. Why isn’t this man a superstar already? It is because in WWE, a legacy is not something that gives you nepotistic opportunities, it is an albatross that hangs from your neck. His client is a third generation superstar and he wants to carve his own niche and legend. That is why they have taken his father’s given name Curt and they have paid homage to his grandfather, Larry ‘The Axe’ Hennig, a new name and a new brand that will be known as Curtis Axel.
Triple H’s music plays and he makes his way to the stage and he has the COO of water with him. Hunter makes his way to the ring. Hunter says that Paul can really whip up a batch of Kool-Aid.
Hunter tells Curtis that the adults are talking so he should be quiet. He says that Paul can put whatever spin he wants to put on the match but he should not say that Hunter is embarrassed about last night. He went to war with Brock Lesnar and Brock beat him, just like he beat Brock at Wrestlemania. Brock beat him, but he did not walk away from that battle, he limped from that battle.
Hunter says that he was sitting in the back listening to Paul and what would make him real happy is to beat the crap out of Paul because he can.
Curtis gets in Hunter’s face and he tells Hunter that he does not understand. The game around here has changed. If Hunter wants to talk to Paul, he better talk to him first.
Hunter slaps Curtis and he changed his mind. He is going to have a match tonight with Curtis. When he gets done kicking Axel’s ass, he will kick Paul’s.
We go to commercial.
We are back with the Sonic Shakedown. Jack Swagger being attacked by Alberto Del Rio after Swagger’s match on Monday against Big E Langston.
Match Number Three: Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez) versus Big E Langston (with AJ Lee)
They lock up and Del Rio with a kick and punches. Langston with a knee and he sends Del Rio into the corner but Langston misses a shoulder into the corner. Del Rio with the float over into the cross arm breaker but it is not properly applied and Langston picks up Del Rio and hits a power bomb but Del Rio holds on and Langston gets to the ropes.
Del Rio applies the cross arm breaker on the apron and Langston picks up Del Rio and sends him into the ring post. Langston with a kick to the ribs and he sends Del Rio into the ring and he gets a near fall. Langston with punches to the ribs followed by a back breaker but he holds on and stretches Del Rio over his knee. Del Rio escapes but Langston stays in control of the match.
Langston sends Del Rio into the turnbuckles but he runs into boots from Del Rio and Del Rio with a tornado DDT. Del Rio with clotheslines but Langston stays on his feet. Del Rio with a third clothesline and Langston goes down. Del Rio with a lungblower and he hits a super kick and gets a near fall.
Langston avoids the float over into the cross arm breaker and Langston sends Del Rio to the floor. Del Rio is helped back into the ring by Ricardo and Del Rio with an enzuigiri and AJ rolls the bucket into the ring and Langston with a thumb to the eye and Langston hits the Big Ending for the three count.
Winner: Big E Langston
Match Number Four: Layla El versus AJ Lee
AJ with a clothesline followed by a neck breaker or two and she gets a near fall. Layla with forearms but AJ with a clothesline. AJ skips around the ring but Layla misses one kick but connects with another. Layla dances around the ring and she runs her butt into AJ’s face. Layla with a drop kick but AJ holds on to the ropes.
Layla kicks AJ and slaps her. The referee warns Layla and AJ applies the Octopus and Layla taps out.
Winner: AJ Lee
We go to commercial.
Match Number Five: Cody Rhodes versus Zack Ryder
The match is joined in progress and Ryder with a hammer lock and Cody gets to the ropes. Cody with an elbow and he Irish whips Ryder. Ryder with an elbow and then he leaps over Rhodes and hits a drop kick. Rhodes with a kick and he sends Ryder shoulder first into the turnbuckles and he kicks Ryder.
Rhodes with a gourdbuster for a near fall. Rhodes with a hammer lock. Ryder sends Rhodes face first into the mat and then Rhodes runs into boots. Ryder with a missile drop kick and Ryder with a running forearm into the corner but Rhodes does not go down.
Ryder sets for the Broski Boot and he connects. Ryder gets a near fall. Rhodes sends Ryder into the turnbuckles and he misses an O’Connor Roll but he does not miss with the Beautiful Disaster and he gets the three count.
Winner: Cody Rhodes
After the match, Ryback makes his way to the ring and Cody Rhodes shows that he is a smart man because he leaves. Ryback enters the ring where Ryder is still on the mat after losing to Cody.
Ryback does a few laps around Ryder and then he rips off his ripped shirt. Ryback with the lariat to Ryder. Ryback with a power bomb. Ryback with the marching muscle buster to Ryder.
Ryder is thrown over the top rope to the floor.
Ryback picks up Ryder and someone is going to ride in the ambulance.
We go to commercial.
We are back with the WWE Rewind: The Shield has gold while Kofi, Kane, and Daniel Bryan do not.
Dean says that last night, The Shield brought power back to these titles. They are the reason why The Rock lost the WWE Title at Wrestlemania. He had to get surgery. Undertaker didn’t believe and now he is resting in peace. Ryback . . . what they did to him is that they broke him down so much that he felt betrayed and snapped against John Cena. Dean says that they forced John Cena to be carted off last night.
Everyone’s heroes are being brought down one by one by the swift hands of justice.
Seth says that he heard it said that justice is blind, but after what they did last night. Justice can see just fine and everyone can now see what a cohesive unit looks like. They can see the meaning of unbreakable right before them. They can see the future. Seth says that this is just the beginning.
Roman says that the ending stays the same. You put them in front of them and they take them out. The hounds of justice run this yard and they wear the collars to back it up.
The fires of justice are burning bright and they are the flames.
Match Number Six: Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, and Roman Reigns versus Kofi Kingston, Daniel Bryan, and Kane
Kofi and Ambrose start things off and they lock up. Ambrose with a hammer lock but Kofi with a reversal. Ambrose with a reversal of his own and Kofi with a flying mare and leg trip for a near fall. Ambrose with a leg trip for a near fall. Ambrose slaps Kofi and Kofi slaps back. Kofi with a monkey flip and arm drag into an arm bar.
Bryan tags in and he kicks Ambrose and connects with European uppercuts. Bryan with a knee to the midsection followed by a kick to the back and a knee drop to the head for a near fall. Bryan with a hammer lock but Ambrose with a back elbow and Rollins tags in but Bryan with a drop toe hold and an elbow drop to the back.
Bryan sets for the surfboard but he drives Rollins’ knees into the mat followed by a series of kicks to the chest. Kane tags in and Bryan with a snap mare and Kane with a drop kick for a near fall. Kane with an uppercut and then he kicks Rollins in the corner. Kane with a back elbow for a near fall. Kofi tags in and he connects with forearms.
Kofi with a hammer lock and he takes Rollins to the mat. Kofi with a knee drop to the shoulder. Rollins with an elbow to escape followed by a forearm and shoulder tackle. Kofi with leap frogs followed by a leaping back elbow for a near fall. Rollins runs Kofi into the corner and Reigns tags in and he punches Kofi while Rollins keeps Kofi in the corner.
Reigns chokes Kofi and the referee pulls him out of the corner. Ambrose gets in a few punches and Reigns with forearms to the back. Reigns with a running shoulder tackle. Reigns with a reverse chin lock. Reigns gets a near fall. Ambrose tags back in and he kicks Kofi and he sets for the Regal Stretch but Kofi escapes momentarily.
Ambrose slaps Kofi and then he hits a drop kick with Kofi against the ropes and Ambrose gets a near fall. Rollins tags in and he punches Kofi and kicks him and chokes Kofi in the corner. Kofi kicks Rollins and punches him. Rollins with a flatline into the corner and he gets a near fall. Rollins with a rear chin lock but Kofi gets back to his feet and he punches Rollins.
Seth with a punch and slam but Kofi with a head scissors and he tags in Bryan who punches Rollins. Rollins with an Irish whip but Bryan flips over Rollins and then he hits a flying clothesline. Bryan with a running drop kick into the corner. Bryan with kicks to the chest. Bryan misses a round kick but does not miss the second one and he gets a near fall. Bryan goes up top but Rollins crotches Bryan and Ambrose tags in and he climbs the turnbuckles and connects with forearms to the back before he tries for a superplex. Bryan holds on to the turnbuckles and he drops Ambrose to the mat. Bryan with a missile drop kick for a near fall.
Bryan tries for the No Lock but Ambrose gets to the ropes. Reigns pulls Ambrose to the floor. Bryan knocks Rollins off the apron and we have a standoff in the ring.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Kane is in the ring with Reigns but Kofi tags in and he goes up top for a double sledge to the arm. Reigns with a punch to neutralize Kofi. Ambrose tags in and he punches Kofi and runs his eyes along the top rope. Kofi with an Irish whip and Kofi leaps into the corner and he punches Ambrose before returning to the mat and he connects with a European uppercut. Bryan tags in and he kicks Ambrose.
Bryan puts Ambrose in the tree of woe and he kicks Ambrose in the chest. Bryan with a baseball slide to the head and he gets a near fall. Bryan with punches to Ambrose but Rollins with a knee to the back and Rollins tags in and he goes for a buckle bomb and he hits it and gets a near fall. Rollins punches Bryan and he tags in Reigns. Reigns with a short arm clothesline. Reigns stands on Bryan’s hand and he punches Bryan before applying a reverse chin lock.
Bryan with punches to Reigns but Reigns with a running back elbow and a knee lift. Reigns gets a near fall. Ambrose tags in and he stomps on the midsection followed by a snap elbow drop for a near fall. Ambrose with a belly-to-back suplex for a near fall. Ambrose works on the fingers of Bryan and then he punches Bryan but Bryan blocks a punch and he connects with head butts.
Bryan with punches but Ambrose with a knee and he holds Bryan while Rollins punches him. Ambrose tags back in and he punches Bryan and connects with a head butt. Ambrose taunts Bryan and Bryan with a round kick to the head and Ambrose slumps to the mat. Reigns tags in and he tries to stop Bryan from making the tag but Kane tags in.
Kane with a shoulder to Reigns and then he avoids a splash from Reigns and he hits a power slam followed by an Irish whip and clothesline into the corner. Kane with another Irish whip and clothesline followed by a side slam but Ambrose breaks up the cover. Kofi tags care of Ambrose and sends him to the floor. Bryan and Kofi with stereo dives onto Rollins and Ambrose.
Reigns punches Kane but Kane with a DDT. Kane gets a near fall. Bryan suplexes Ambrose on the floor while Rollins sends Kofi into the ring post. Kane with a big boot to Reigns and he sets for the choke slam but Ambrose comes off the top and he is met with an uppercut. The referee deals with Ambrose and Rollins with a knee from the top rope to break up the choke slam attempt and Reigns with a spear to Kane for the three count.
Winners: Dean Ambrose, Roman Reigns, and Seth Rollins
We take a look back at the introduction of Curtis Axel.
Triple H is in the back getting ready and the medical assistant tells Hunter that the doctor does not think Hunter is ready to wrestle tonight. Hunter tells Larry to tell the doctor that if he doesn’t want Hunter to wrestle, he can look for a new job.
We are back and Kaitlyn finally got a phone number for the secret admirer. Natalya tells Kaitlyn that she will get Magnum Khali on the job. Kaitlyn sees Cody Rhodes with his phone and Kaitlyn things it might be him. Natalya runs interference and Kaitlyn takes his phone and realizes it isn’t Cody.
Kaitlyn says that she is glad that it isn’t Cody.
Jerry Lawler tells everyone that there were more than 150,000 votes for Jack Swagger’s opponent and it is . .
Match Number Seven: Jack Swagger (with Zeb Colter) versus Randy Orton
They lock up and Swagger with a side head lock and take down. Orton with a side head lock but Swagger with a top wrist lock and he takes Orton to the mat. Orton with a rake of the eyes followed by a European uppercut and drop kick. They go to the floor and Orton with a belly-to-back suplex onto the ringside barrier.
Orton returns to the ring and then he goes back to the floor to clothesline Swagger. Orton with a European uppercut on the floor and he gets a near fall when they go into the ring. Orton climbs the turnbuckles and he punches Swagger. Orton with more punches from the turnbuckles. Orton with a suplex.
Orton gets a near fall. Swagger with a kick to the knee and a forearm to the back and kick to the ribs. Swagger with a running shoulder tackle. Swagger with knees in the corner until the referee warns him. Orton with kicks but he misses a clothesline. Orton with a Thesz Press and punches. Orton stomps on the hand but he checks on his knee. Swagger with a shoulder into the knee and then he hyper-extends the knee and he applies a step over toe hold.
Orton pulls the strap to get Swagger closer to him and he punches Swagger but Swagger maintains the hold. Orton with punches to get out of the hold but the damage has been done. Orton sends Swagger over the top rope to the floor. Orton puts Swagger over the apron and he goes for the IEDDT but Swagger gets to the floor and he runs Orton into the ringside barrier and then into the apron.
They return to the ring and Swagger gets a near fall. Swagger returns to the step over toe hold. Orton with punches to Swagger but Swagger with an Irish whip and Orton gets his feet up. Swagger knocks Orton off the turnbuckles and he falls to the floor as we go to commercial.
We are back and Swagger is working on the injured ankle but Orton gets to the ropes. Orton continues to favor his knee and he connects with knees in the corner. Swagger misses a charge into the corner and he goes shoulder first into the post. Orton sends Swagger into the turnbuckle and they go up top and Orton with a superplex and both men are down.
Orton gets a near fall. Orton limps to Swagger and he runs his laces across the face followed by European uppercuts and punches but Swagger with a belly-to-belly suplex for a near fall. Swagger goes for the double jump Swagger Bomb but Orton recovers and kicks Swagger in the midsection.
Orton with two clotheslines followed by a missed one from Swagger. Orton with a power slam and then Swagger goes to the apron. Orton tries for the IEDDT but Swagger gets back into the ring and he hits a power slam for a near fall. Swagger with an ankle lock but Orton rolls through and sends Swagger into the turnbuckles. Orton with a back breaker for a near fall.
Orton sends Swagger to the apron and the third time is the charm for the IEDDT and then he looks around for the right place to twist to the mat to set up the RKO. Orton cannot gets the momentum to hit the RKO and Swagger ducks it and applies the ankle lock. Orton tries to kick Swagger away and he returns to the hold.
Orton gets to the ropes but Swagger pulls Orton back into the center of the ring. Swagger is kicked to the floor and he returns to the ring only to be met with an RKO and Orton gets the three count.
Winner: Randy Orton
We go to commercial.
Match Number Eight: Triple H (with GameFountain) versus Curt Axel (with Paul Heyman)
Axel moves around Hunter and takes a few shots in Hunter’s general direction. Curt turns his back and Hunter puts him into the corner. Hunter with a short arm clothesline. Hunter with another short arm clothesline for a near fall. Hunter sends Curt to the floor in front of Heyman.
Hunter sends him back into the ring but Curt with a forearm and kicks in the corner. Curt with punches and kicks until the referee pulls him out of the corner. Hunter puts Curt in the corner and he punches Axel. Curt with a drop kick and he gets a near fall. Curt with kicks and he chokes Hunter in the corner.
Hunter with an Irish whip but Curt with a shot to the jaw. Curt with forearms to the head and then he goes to the turnbuckles for an elbow drop and he gets a near fall. Michael with a reverse chin lock. Hunter backs Curt into the turnbuckles and connects with shoulders. Hunter with a facebuster and then he hits the spinebuster and he poses.
Hunter clotheslines Axel over the top rope to the floor but Hunter tries to fix his jaw. Hunter goes to the floor and he sends Axel into the apron. Curt with punches to Hunter but Hunter with a clothesline on the floor and he sends Curt back into the ring. Hunter cannot get back into the ring and he needs to take a breather. Hunter takes a seat at ringside.
He comes out of his corner but he cannot get back into the ring and he falls to a knee. The medical staff checks on Hunter and they say that he cannot continue.
The referee checks on Hunter as well but Hunter refuses the care and we go to credits. 


Nessun commento:

Posta un commento