12.27 Impact Wrestling
by Jeff Hamlin ( hamlin37@hotmail.com) Twitter: @hamlin37
The Big News: Mr. Anderson is being recruited as a potential new member of Aces and Eights. The final show of the year was largely handled as a series of matches. It was an Open Fight Night, but without any Gut Check segment.
Happy New Year to everyone. Best wishes for 2013.
Bully Ray came out and said he had respect for Hulk Hogan, but didn't know what he had to do to earn his respect. So he called down Hogan, but only to talk instead of fight. There was no Hulk, but Brooke did come down. Talking "off mic," Brooke told Ray that her father knows about them, but doesn't know how. Well, if had she watched the show last week, she might have noticed a camera catching them making out, with Hulk watching the entire thing. She told Ray that they should talk to Hulk in order to settle things and they left together. Does this mean Hulk has to fire himself since he was called out on Open Fight Night, but didn't answer the challenge? No Hogan at all on the show, and this was the last we ever heard of this tonight.
Austin Aries went to the ring and said he had Jeff Hardy pinned last week and should be TNA Champion. So Aries called out the man who screwed him over last week, Bobby Roode. But Aries said the match would have to wait until the main event.
Samoa Joe was next in line in challenging people and called down "the masked man" from Aces and Eights and promised to unmask him. It was Mike Knox who answered the call.
Samoa Joe defeated a masked man from Aces and Eights in 2:56. Joe hit the senton after a knee to the jaw, then clamped on the Kokina Clutch until Knox passed out and referee Earl Hebner stopped it, Herb Dean style. Joe went to unmask him, but five members of Aces and Eights ran in to stop him. So much for the babyface upholding promises *1/4
Robbie E and Robbie T were backstage when Jesse walked by. They traded words and teased having a match for Open Fight Night, but Robbie E. suggested a "bro-off" instead. Jesse, and even Robbie T., looked confused as to exactly what that was.
Kenny King talked with Christian York about possibly being called out by Rob Van Dam tonight. King, who was all full of himself, said Van Dam would call him out. King said when he beats Van Dam for a second time, he'll give York a title shot, so he should take notes. York muttered something about King's arrogance.
Robbie E. challenged Jesse, who walked down with Tara. Jesse, who proclaimed himself "Mr. Pectacular," was told there were three rules to a Bro-Off. 1. It was every bro for themselves. 2. Everything they said has to end in "bro." He forgot the third one. Robbie E. started dancing in order to make himself look as ridiculous as possible. Jesse had this music that sounded like Chris Masters, and started flexing like him. He also pressed Tara just like his standard ring entrance. Robbie E. told him in a bro-off, it was bros, not hos. Robbie started to proclaim himself the winner because Jesse called him dude and not bro. But then Robbie T. said there was one more bro who had yet to compete. Then Robbie T did his own posedown routine, where he showed off more charisma in two minutes than his entire three-year stint in the company combined. He started dancing, and didn't look silly at all. Crowd got into him, and he even did some pelvic thrusts to get a beefcake pop. He finished, walked over to Robbie T and said "bro" and left to a good babyface pop. Whole segment was to put the wheels in motion for a Robbie T. turn, and was entertaining.
Van Dam came out doing a scripted promo for his challenge. Anyone who watched Van Dam in 2006 WWE knows how poorly that combination goes. Van Dam teased challenging King, who was anticipating it backstage. Instead, it was York who got the challenge.
2. Rob Van Dam defeated Christian York in a nontitle match in 4:04. York hit a half-nelson German Suplex and a Koppo Kick, followed by a somersault tope. York hit a missile dropkick to the back, and connected with his finisher, the Mood Swing, for a two count. Van Dam took a knee to the jaw and York continued with a double stomp to the back for another near fall. Van Dam made his comeback with a split-legged moonsault and Rolling Thunder, and got the pin with the Five Star Frog Splash. **1/2
Devon met with some members of Aces and Eights, and talked about adding someone to Aces and Eights. He talked about how the mysterious person was arrogant and difficult to deal with, but if they made him part of the club they would have him for good. Devon called in Doc, who stepped in with two women. Devon asked if they could get this guy, and Doc just smiled.
Joseph Park is still training Ohio Valley Wrestling. Park talked about all the great wrestlers in the Park family, such as his little brother Chris. You know, Abyss. He also mentioned his great-great grandfather, Jebediah Park, who he claimed fought George Hackenschmidt in a bare-knuckled match. I must have missed that part during Karl Stern's History of Pro Wrestling audio shows last year. Maybe it's on one of those Stern Sticks.Anyway, Park talked about how much progress he thinks he's making and has set the bar high. Cut to an interview with trainer Danny Davis, who said Park was dumber than a box of rocks. Davis brought up the scene from last week, when Park turned into Abyss after getting cut across the nose.
Christopher Daniels and Kazarian talked at a merchandise stand, where they found none of their t-shirts available. Daniels promised the world a nice post-Christmas present. Kazarian dumped a pile of A.J. Styles t-shirts in the garbage can.
Roode said he knew Aries would call him out tonight. He promised to win tonight and beat Jeff Hardy at Genesis for the TNA World Title.
Another Sting return promo aired, vowing to get revenge on Aces and Eights. He's back next week.
Daniels danced down the ramp and did a funny heel interview. Daniels mockingly challenged Styles to another match, but of course it was Kazarian dressed as Styles. Kazarian had Styles' mannerisms down pat. Then Kazarian started doing Styles impressions, and he had his accent down to the bone. You could hear people in the crowd laughing when it was supposed to get heat. Some still chanted for Styles. Kazarian, doing a Styles' impression, vowed to go get Claire Lynch. Daniels said that wasn't a good idea, and Kazarian snapped out of character. Chavo Guerrero Jr. and Hernandez came out and challenged them to a match. Seriously, I can't come up with one good reason why Daniels and Kazarian dropped the tag team belts earlier this year.
3. Hernandez and Chavo Guerrero defeated Bad Influence in a nontitle match in 16:04. The comedy by Daniels and Kazarian was so good, no one wanted to boo them. It made for a pretty dead match by Bad Influence standards. Another part of it is Guerrero and Hernandez aren't over. Guerrero hit slingshot sentons on Kazarian and Daniels early. Hernandez missed a slingshot shoulder block after Kazarian pulled Daniels away. Kazarian and Daniels hit their slingshot legdrop and elbow drop on Hernandez and continued double teaming until Hernandez caught the Pounce Period on Daniels. Guerrero got the satellite head scissors on Kazarian and spinning backbreaker on Daniels. Kazaria and Daniels both were dumped to the floor, where Guerrero hit a tope on Kazarian and Hernandez hit the 300-pound tope on Daniels. Kazarian missed the A.J. Styles springboard forearm but missed, and Guerrero got the pin with a frog splash. ***1/2
Hardy said he was looking forward to watching Roode and Aries beat the hell out of each other tonight, and said he would get revenge on both of them soon. All but guaranteed a Hardy run-in during the main event.
Aces and Eights met with the mysterious potential recruit. It turned out to be Mr. Anderson, who expressed some reservations. That is, until two hot looking women stepped up in his arms. Anderson then seemed more open to the idea, but didn't give a final decision about joining the group.
Gail Kim came down and said she was the longest-reigning Knockouts champion this year until Miss Tessmacher defeated her in a fluke. So she challenged Tessmacher.
4. Gail Kim defeated Miss Tessmacher in 5:23. Kim worked really hard, taking bumps on aprons and falling off the top rope after failing on a huracanrana attempt. Tessmacher got a flying clothesline for a two count. Kim gave Tessmacher an atomic drop and a huracanrana, then rubbed her pelvis in Kim's face. Tessmacher went for the TessShocker, but Kim put on the breaks. Tessmacher missed a top rope elbow, and Kim got the pin following Eat Defeat. **
5. Bobby Roode and Austin Aries went to a no contest in 12:50. As you would expect, it was a heel vs. heel match. Aries worked a knee injury after a leap frog spot, but Roode wasn't buying it and kicked his leg. Aries kicked Roode out of the ring and teased a tope, but Roode got back in the ring. As tey were about to go to a commercial, Hardy was shown watching at ringside, and we got the thoughts from inside his head again. This time, he said neither man deserved to be world champion. They had a lengthy battle on the top rope where they traded double chops until Roode finally went down, but Aries missed a missile dropkick. But Roode ran right into the Last Chancery. Aries had his faces raked on the escape, and then ran into Roode's Crossface. Aries reached for the eyes to get out, as well. They traded stiff chops in the corner until Roode tried to get the pin by using the ropes, but Hebner caught him. Aries tried to get a schoolboy cradle by holding the tights, but Hebner again was on the ball to break it. Roode caught a Double R Spinebuster for a two count. Roode brought a chair in the ring, but Hebner took it away. Aries nailed Roode with a roaring elbow for a two count. Aries grabbed the chair, but Hebner again was having none of it. Hebner started screaming at both men until Aries and Roode kicked Hebner and threw him out of the ring. Roode and Aries fought over the chair until Hardy ran in and clotheslined Aries over the top rope, and gave Roode the Twist of Fate. **3/4
SUMMARY: Pretty good show to end the year. A heel turn for Anderson is really trivial now, because his character seems passé at this point.
by Jeff Hamlin ( hamlin37@hotmail.com) Twitter: @hamlin37
The Big News: Mr. Anderson is being recruited as a potential new member of Aces and Eights. The final show of the year was largely handled as a series of matches. It was an Open Fight Night, but without any Gut Check segment.
Happy New Year to everyone. Best wishes for 2013.
Bully Ray came out and said he had respect for Hulk Hogan, but didn't know what he had to do to earn his respect. So he called down Hogan, but only to talk instead of fight. There was no Hulk, but Brooke did come down. Talking "off mic," Brooke told Ray that her father knows about them, but doesn't know how. Well, if had she watched the show last week, she might have noticed a camera catching them making out, with Hulk watching the entire thing. She told Ray that they should talk to Hulk in order to settle things and they left together. Does this mean Hulk has to fire himself since he was called out on Open Fight Night, but didn't answer the challenge? No Hogan at all on the show, and this was the last we ever heard of this tonight.
Austin Aries went to the ring and said he had Jeff Hardy pinned last week and should be TNA Champion. So Aries called out the man who screwed him over last week, Bobby Roode. But Aries said the match would have to wait until the main event.
Samoa Joe was next in line in challenging people and called down "the masked man" from Aces and Eights and promised to unmask him. It was Mike Knox who answered the call.
Samoa Joe defeated a masked man from Aces and Eights in 2:56. Joe hit the senton after a knee to the jaw, then clamped on the Kokina Clutch until Knox passed out and referee Earl Hebner stopped it, Herb Dean style. Joe went to unmask him, but five members of Aces and Eights ran in to stop him. So much for the babyface upholding promises *1/4
Robbie E and Robbie T were backstage when Jesse walked by. They traded words and teased having a match for Open Fight Night, but Robbie E. suggested a "bro-off" instead. Jesse, and even Robbie T., looked confused as to exactly what that was.
Kenny King talked with Christian York about possibly being called out by Rob Van Dam tonight. King, who was all full of himself, said Van Dam would call him out. King said when he beats Van Dam for a second time, he'll give York a title shot, so he should take notes. York muttered something about King's arrogance.
Robbie E. challenged Jesse, who walked down with Tara. Jesse, who proclaimed himself "Mr. Pectacular," was told there were three rules to a Bro-Off. 1. It was every bro for themselves. 2. Everything they said has to end in "bro." He forgot the third one. Robbie E. started dancing in order to make himself look as ridiculous as possible. Jesse had this music that sounded like Chris Masters, and started flexing like him. He also pressed Tara just like his standard ring entrance. Robbie E. told him in a bro-off, it was bros, not hos. Robbie started to proclaim himself the winner because Jesse called him dude and not bro. But then Robbie T. said there was one more bro who had yet to compete. Then Robbie T did his own posedown routine, where he showed off more charisma in two minutes than his entire three-year stint in the company combined. He started dancing, and didn't look silly at all. Crowd got into him, and he even did some pelvic thrusts to get a beefcake pop. He finished, walked over to Robbie T and said "bro" and left to a good babyface pop. Whole segment was to put the wheels in motion for a Robbie T. turn, and was entertaining.
Van Dam came out doing a scripted promo for his challenge. Anyone who watched Van Dam in 2006 WWE knows how poorly that combination goes. Van Dam teased challenging King, who was anticipating it backstage. Instead, it was York who got the challenge.
2. Rob Van Dam defeated Christian York in a nontitle match in 4:04. York hit a half-nelson German Suplex and a Koppo Kick, followed by a somersault tope. York hit a missile dropkick to the back, and connected with his finisher, the Mood Swing, for a two count. Van Dam took a knee to the jaw and York continued with a double stomp to the back for another near fall. Van Dam made his comeback with a split-legged moonsault and Rolling Thunder, and got the pin with the Five Star Frog Splash. **1/2
Devon met with some members of Aces and Eights, and talked about adding someone to Aces and Eights. He talked about how the mysterious person was arrogant and difficult to deal with, but if they made him part of the club they would have him for good. Devon called in Doc, who stepped in with two women. Devon asked if they could get this guy, and Doc just smiled.
Joseph Park is still training Ohio Valley Wrestling. Park talked about all the great wrestlers in the Park family, such as his little brother Chris. You know, Abyss. He also mentioned his great-great grandfather, Jebediah Park, who he claimed fought George Hackenschmidt in a bare-knuckled match. I must have missed that part during Karl Stern's History of Pro Wrestling audio shows last year. Maybe it's on one of those Stern Sticks.Anyway, Park talked about how much progress he thinks he's making and has set the bar high. Cut to an interview with trainer Danny Davis, who said Park was dumber than a box of rocks. Davis brought up the scene from last week, when Park turned into Abyss after getting cut across the nose.
Christopher Daniels and Kazarian talked at a merchandise stand, where they found none of their t-shirts available. Daniels promised the world a nice post-Christmas present. Kazarian dumped a pile of A.J. Styles t-shirts in the garbage can.
Roode said he knew Aries would call him out tonight. He promised to win tonight and beat Jeff Hardy at Genesis for the TNA World Title.
Another Sting return promo aired, vowing to get revenge on Aces and Eights. He's back next week.
Daniels danced down the ramp and did a funny heel interview. Daniels mockingly challenged Styles to another match, but of course it was Kazarian dressed as Styles. Kazarian had Styles' mannerisms down pat. Then Kazarian started doing Styles impressions, and he had his accent down to the bone. You could hear people in the crowd laughing when it was supposed to get heat. Some still chanted for Styles. Kazarian, doing a Styles' impression, vowed to go get Claire Lynch. Daniels said that wasn't a good idea, and Kazarian snapped out of character. Chavo Guerrero Jr. and Hernandez came out and challenged them to a match. Seriously, I can't come up with one good reason why Daniels and Kazarian dropped the tag team belts earlier this year.
3. Hernandez and Chavo Guerrero defeated Bad Influence in a nontitle match in 16:04. The comedy by Daniels and Kazarian was so good, no one wanted to boo them. It made for a pretty dead match by Bad Influence standards. Another part of it is Guerrero and Hernandez aren't over. Guerrero hit slingshot sentons on Kazarian and Daniels early. Hernandez missed a slingshot shoulder block after Kazarian pulled Daniels away. Kazarian and Daniels hit their slingshot legdrop and elbow drop on Hernandez and continued double teaming until Hernandez caught the Pounce Period on Daniels. Guerrero got the satellite head scissors on Kazarian and spinning backbreaker on Daniels. Kazaria and Daniels both were dumped to the floor, where Guerrero hit a tope on Kazarian and Hernandez hit the 300-pound tope on Daniels. Kazarian missed the A.J. Styles springboard forearm but missed, and Guerrero got the pin with a frog splash. ***1/2
Hardy said he was looking forward to watching Roode and Aries beat the hell out of each other tonight, and said he would get revenge on both of them soon. All but guaranteed a Hardy run-in during the main event.
Aces and Eights met with the mysterious potential recruit. It turned out to be Mr. Anderson, who expressed some reservations. That is, until two hot looking women stepped up in his arms. Anderson then seemed more open to the idea, but didn't give a final decision about joining the group.
Gail Kim came down and said she was the longest-reigning Knockouts champion this year until Miss Tessmacher defeated her in a fluke. So she challenged Tessmacher.
4. Gail Kim defeated Miss Tessmacher in 5:23. Kim worked really hard, taking bumps on aprons and falling off the top rope after failing on a huracanrana attempt. Tessmacher got a flying clothesline for a two count. Kim gave Tessmacher an atomic drop and a huracanrana, then rubbed her pelvis in Kim's face. Tessmacher went for the TessShocker, but Kim put on the breaks. Tessmacher missed a top rope elbow, and Kim got the pin following Eat Defeat. **
5. Bobby Roode and Austin Aries went to a no contest in 12:50. As you would expect, it was a heel vs. heel match. Aries worked a knee injury after a leap frog spot, but Roode wasn't buying it and kicked his leg. Aries kicked Roode out of the ring and teased a tope, but Roode got back in the ring. As tey were about to go to a commercial, Hardy was shown watching at ringside, and we got the thoughts from inside his head again. This time, he said neither man deserved to be world champion. They had a lengthy battle on the top rope where they traded double chops until Roode finally went down, but Aries missed a missile dropkick. But Roode ran right into the Last Chancery. Aries had his faces raked on the escape, and then ran into Roode's Crossface. Aries reached for the eyes to get out, as well. They traded stiff chops in the corner until Roode tried to get the pin by using the ropes, but Hebner caught him. Aries tried to get a schoolboy cradle by holding the tights, but Hebner again was on the ball to break it. Roode caught a Double R Spinebuster for a two count. Roode brought a chair in the ring, but Hebner took it away. Aries nailed Roode with a roaring elbow for a two count. Aries grabbed the chair, but Hebner again was having none of it. Hebner started screaming at both men until Aries and Roode kicked Hebner and threw him out of the ring. Roode and Aries fought over the chair until Hardy ran in and clotheslined Aries over the top rope, and gave Roode the Twist of Fate. **3/4
SUMMARY: Pretty good show to end the year. A heel turn for Anderson is really trivial now, because his character seems passé at this point.
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