2.7 Impact Wrestling
by Jeff Hamlin ( hamlin37@hotmail.com)
The Big News: A show almost completely devoid of angles. Bobby Roode and Austin Aries won the TNA Tag Team titles over Hernandez and Chavo Guerrero in the show's best match.
Aces and Eights came out, including the first official appearances of Garrett Bischoff and Wes Brisco in the group. Bischoff has his father's mannerisms down pat, and his interview pattern, as well. Devon introduced Bischoff, whose promo must've been lacking because it was heavily edited. Basically he told the fans to go to hell. Really didn't explain the heel turn. Brisco said he turned because Hulk Hogan didn't answer his phone calls for two years to join the company, then told him to start at the final. Brisco said it was his father who gave Hogan his first pair of wrestling boots. Brisco said joining Aces and Eights would take him to the top of the ladder. Wes hasn't been paying attention to the win-loss records lately. Devon said they would have an Ace up their sleeve for the tables match tonight.
Jessie Godderz and Tara were messing around backstage when they went into Brooke Hogan's office and complained about flying to England on coach. Tara was upset about facing Miss Tessmacher tonight without a beauty rest. Brooke said Tara would have to go through with the match and Godderz was banned from ringside. Then she ordered Jessie to grab her a coffee.
Rob Van Dam pinned Xema Ion in a three-way match that also included Kenny King to retain the X Division title in 5:55. Rob Van Dam worked much harder than usual appearing in a larger-than-usual crowd. Kenny King opened with a corkscrew tope, and Zema Ion came back with a somersault tope. King may have knocked King silly with his Hostile Makeover finisher, because King appeared to be shaken up. Ion could be heard giving King instructions to stay down for a moonsault spot late in the match. Finish came when King delivered a Northern Lights Suplex on Ion. Meanwhile, Van Dam, who took several bumps to the floor, delivered a Five Star Frog Splash on KIng to break up the pin attempt, and Van Dam pinned Ion. **1/4
Bobby Roode and Austin Aries talked about how superior they were to everyone else, and they would soon take the tag team titles tonight from Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez.
There was a promo for British Bootcamp promo which profiled the four contestants training with Mark "Rollerball" Rocco and Hogan. If you haven't watched any of the episodes, the piece would make you think Hogan is at the center of it. Rockstar Spud was revealed as the winner of the competition.
Bruce Pritchard talked with D. Lo Brown about how stunned he was about Brisco's turn. Kurt Angle is apparently out for a cycle because Pritchard talked about how Angle would return, and Brisco would have hell to pay. Of course, it never dawned on Pritchard that Brown was the one who cast the deciding vote on Gut Check that got Brisco a spot on the Impact roster.
Godderz was in the ring saying since he wasn't going to be at ringside tonight, he would pose for the fans in England because they didn't have anyone else to cheer for from their country. James Storm came out with his babyface talk about beer and said he was going to superkick every tooth out of Godderz mouth. So they had a match.
2. James Storm pinned Jessie Godderz in 3:04. Godderz's offense gave Storm a bloody nose. Storm finished Godderz with the Eye of the Storm, Closing Time and the Last Call, then drank beer for the celebration. *1/2
3. Austin Aries and Bobby Roode defeated Hernandez and Chavo Guerrero Jr. to become the new TNA Tag Team Champions in 17:49. From tagging each other too hard to Aries pouting when Roode gets his ring music played during the entrance, Roode and Aries are very entertaining. In fact, Aries got the lion's share of chants and there was huge babyface pop when the heels won. Early on, Aries accidentally hit Roode with a tope. That was the first of a series of spots where Roode and Aries collided. Towards the finish, Hernandez rammed Aries into Roode, and the two started arguing. Roode acted like he was walking out, and briefly did. Hernandez set up the Border Toss on Aries, but Roode ran back in and put Aries down. Then Aries gave Hernandez a low blow, while Roode crotched Guerrero, who was standing on the top rope ready to give Aries a frog splash. Roode gave Guerrero a Double R Spinebuster, and Aries pinned Guerrero after a spectacular 450 splash from midway across the ring. ***1/4
Bully Ray talked to Sting about their tables match tonight as Brooke watched on. Hogan walked in and told Ray that everything was on him to prove to Hogan he was the good guy everybody says he is. Ray told Hogan he wasn't a good guy, and he hasn't forgotten what Aces and Eights did to Sting, Hogan and his wife on their wedding day. Ray said he's a very bad man. Hogan said if Ray was truly family, tonight should be right up his ally. They gave each other a fist bump, and Hogan smirked like he was proud to have Ray fired up.
A package of the trials and tribulations of A.J. Styles reviewed his dismal 2012, including his loss to Christopher Daniels at Final Resolution.
4. Miss Tessmacher defeated Tara in a nontitle match in 6:24. Lately, the Knockouts have had longer matches to some avail. This was not one of them. Crowd was dead. Tara acted like she missed Jesse and couldn't wrestle without him. Pretty standard offense from Tara, including a stiff Spider's Web for a near fall. Tessmacher made her comeback with a series of clothesline until Tara cut her off. Tara turned her back and looked to the entrance and again called out for Jesse. That gave Tessmacher an opening to hit the Tess Shocker for the three count. *
Jeremy Borash, who looked awed by the crowd, introduced Rockstar Spud. He got a big ovation from the crowd. Spud carried himself off like a total star, wearing a black leather jacket. Unfortunately, Borash towered over him. Spud did a real good promo until Robbie E. and Robbie T. came out. Robbie E. said it was a travesty that Spud won and made fun of his size.When Robbie E. said that Spud should be delivering pizza, Robbie E hid behind Robbie T., and taunted Spud. Robbie E. kept at it until Robbie T got tired of it and pretended to drop the clipboard. As Robbie T kneeled down to pick it up, Spud decked Robbie E. That didn't get the pop you would expect. Robbie T. pretended he didn't know what happened. As he started to leave, Robbie T. was stopped by Spud, who asked him to hold up the devils' horns like he was Ronnie James Dio. Robbie T. complied and the crowd gave him the horns back while Robbie E. watched on in outrage.
Ray and Sting headed to the ring for their match. Sting told Ray to get his game face on. Brooke rooted them on and hugged Ray. Brooke was grating here.
5. Bully Ray and Sting defeated Devon and Doc in a tables match in 14:06. Ray came out in Sting's war paint. He even did a Stinger splash on Devon, and Sting followed with a standard Stinger Splash on Devon, as well. Sting and Ray did the old Dudleys spots on Devon, including Wazzup and Get the Tables. Later, the heels got the advantage and tried to suplex Sting through the table, but Ray moved it out of the way. Sting teased a superplex on Doc through the table, but the Aces and Eights member formerly known as Mike Knox ran into move the table. FInish came when Ray did a Hogan comeback routine, right down to pointing the bad finger at Devon. Crowd ate it up. Ray hit the three punches on Devon, gave him the Hogan boot and gave him a spinebuster through the table. Entertaining. **1/2
SUMMARY: At some point, Aces and Eights has to get more heat in order to be taken seriously as an invading group. But that ship may have sailed in terms of getting people to care.
by Jeff Hamlin ( hamlin37@hotmail.com)
The Big News: A show almost completely devoid of angles. Bobby Roode and Austin Aries won the TNA Tag Team titles over Hernandez and Chavo Guerrero in the show's best match.
Aces and Eights came out, including the first official appearances of Garrett Bischoff and Wes Brisco in the group. Bischoff has his father's mannerisms down pat, and his interview pattern, as well. Devon introduced Bischoff, whose promo must've been lacking because it was heavily edited. Basically he told the fans to go to hell. Really didn't explain the heel turn. Brisco said he turned because Hulk Hogan didn't answer his phone calls for two years to join the company, then told him to start at the final. Brisco said it was his father who gave Hogan his first pair of wrestling boots. Brisco said joining Aces and Eights would take him to the top of the ladder. Wes hasn't been paying attention to the win-loss records lately. Devon said they would have an Ace up their sleeve for the tables match tonight.
Jessie Godderz and Tara were messing around backstage when they went into Brooke Hogan's office and complained about flying to England on coach. Tara was upset about facing Miss Tessmacher tonight without a beauty rest. Brooke said Tara would have to go through with the match and Godderz was banned from ringside. Then she ordered Jessie to grab her a coffee.
Rob Van Dam pinned Xema Ion in a three-way match that also included Kenny King to retain the X Division title in 5:55. Rob Van Dam worked much harder than usual appearing in a larger-than-usual crowd. Kenny King opened with a corkscrew tope, and Zema Ion came back with a somersault tope. King may have knocked King silly with his Hostile Makeover finisher, because King appeared to be shaken up. Ion could be heard giving King instructions to stay down for a moonsault spot late in the match. Finish came when King delivered a Northern Lights Suplex on Ion. Meanwhile, Van Dam, who took several bumps to the floor, delivered a Five Star Frog Splash on KIng to break up the pin attempt, and Van Dam pinned Ion. **1/4
Bobby Roode and Austin Aries talked about how superior they were to everyone else, and they would soon take the tag team titles tonight from Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez.
There was a promo for British Bootcamp promo which profiled the four contestants training with Mark "Rollerball" Rocco and Hogan. If you haven't watched any of the episodes, the piece would make you think Hogan is at the center of it. Rockstar Spud was revealed as the winner of the competition.
Bruce Pritchard talked with D. Lo Brown about how stunned he was about Brisco's turn. Kurt Angle is apparently out for a cycle because Pritchard talked about how Angle would return, and Brisco would have hell to pay. Of course, it never dawned on Pritchard that Brown was the one who cast the deciding vote on Gut Check that got Brisco a spot on the Impact roster.
Godderz was in the ring saying since he wasn't going to be at ringside tonight, he would pose for the fans in England because they didn't have anyone else to cheer for from their country. James Storm came out with his babyface talk about beer and said he was going to superkick every tooth out of Godderz mouth. So they had a match.
2. James Storm pinned Jessie Godderz in 3:04. Godderz's offense gave Storm a bloody nose. Storm finished Godderz with the Eye of the Storm, Closing Time and the Last Call, then drank beer for the celebration. *1/2
3. Austin Aries and Bobby Roode defeated Hernandez and Chavo Guerrero Jr. to become the new TNA Tag Team Champions in 17:49. From tagging each other too hard to Aries pouting when Roode gets his ring music played during the entrance, Roode and Aries are very entertaining. In fact, Aries got the lion's share of chants and there was huge babyface pop when the heels won. Early on, Aries accidentally hit Roode with a tope. That was the first of a series of spots where Roode and Aries collided. Towards the finish, Hernandez rammed Aries into Roode, and the two started arguing. Roode acted like he was walking out, and briefly did. Hernandez set up the Border Toss on Aries, but Roode ran back in and put Aries down. Then Aries gave Hernandez a low blow, while Roode crotched Guerrero, who was standing on the top rope ready to give Aries a frog splash. Roode gave Guerrero a Double R Spinebuster, and Aries pinned Guerrero after a spectacular 450 splash from midway across the ring. ***1/4
Bully Ray talked to Sting about their tables match tonight as Brooke watched on. Hogan walked in and told Ray that everything was on him to prove to Hogan he was the good guy everybody says he is. Ray told Hogan he wasn't a good guy, and he hasn't forgotten what Aces and Eights did to Sting, Hogan and his wife on their wedding day. Ray said he's a very bad man. Hogan said if Ray was truly family, tonight should be right up his ally. They gave each other a fist bump, and Hogan smirked like he was proud to have Ray fired up.
A package of the trials and tribulations of A.J. Styles reviewed his dismal 2012, including his loss to Christopher Daniels at Final Resolution.
4. Miss Tessmacher defeated Tara in a nontitle match in 6:24. Lately, the Knockouts have had longer matches to some avail. This was not one of them. Crowd was dead. Tara acted like she missed Jesse and couldn't wrestle without him. Pretty standard offense from Tara, including a stiff Spider's Web for a near fall. Tessmacher made her comeback with a series of clothesline until Tara cut her off. Tara turned her back and looked to the entrance and again called out for Jesse. That gave Tessmacher an opening to hit the Tess Shocker for the three count. *
Jeremy Borash, who looked awed by the crowd, introduced Rockstar Spud. He got a big ovation from the crowd. Spud carried himself off like a total star, wearing a black leather jacket. Unfortunately, Borash towered over him. Spud did a real good promo until Robbie E. and Robbie T. came out. Robbie E. said it was a travesty that Spud won and made fun of his size.When Robbie E. said that Spud should be delivering pizza, Robbie E hid behind Robbie T., and taunted Spud. Robbie E. kept at it until Robbie T got tired of it and pretended to drop the clipboard. As Robbie T kneeled down to pick it up, Spud decked Robbie E. That didn't get the pop you would expect. Robbie T. pretended he didn't know what happened. As he started to leave, Robbie T. was stopped by Spud, who asked him to hold up the devils' horns like he was Ronnie James Dio. Robbie T. complied and the crowd gave him the horns back while Robbie E. watched on in outrage.
Ray and Sting headed to the ring for their match. Sting told Ray to get his game face on. Brooke rooted them on and hugged Ray. Brooke was grating here.
5. Bully Ray and Sting defeated Devon and Doc in a tables match in 14:06. Ray came out in Sting's war paint. He even did a Stinger splash on Devon, and Sting followed with a standard Stinger Splash on Devon, as well. Sting and Ray did the old Dudleys spots on Devon, including Wazzup and Get the Tables. Later, the heels got the advantage and tried to suplex Sting through the table, but Ray moved it out of the way. Sting teased a superplex on Doc through the table, but the Aces and Eights member formerly known as Mike Knox ran into move the table. FInish came when Ray did a Hogan comeback routine, right down to pointing the bad finger at Devon. Crowd ate it up. Ray hit the three punches on Devon, gave him the Hogan boot and gave him a spinebuster through the table. Entertaining. **1/2
SUMMARY: At some point, Aces and Eights has to get more heat in order to be taken seriously as an invading group. But that ship may have sailed in terms of getting people to care.
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